Standing Firm

I am marveling at how God’s intricate plan for this cancer battle is unfolding.  There are so many pieces, and He is in all of it.  Thoughts of His guidance and grace bombard me, and I cannot write it all down fast enough. 

I marvel at how strong and courageous my husband is as he deals minute by minute with the side effects and emotions of this cancer attack.  I’m not sure how I expected him to be, maybe more like I would be, whining and seeking comfort from others.  He is seeking God’s comfort, confident, capable, enduring.  He is memorizing God’s encouraging words of Isaiah 40. And instead of complaining about how he feels, Mark is complaining about how difficult it is to memorize these days.  (Our first grader recites the whole Christmas story from Luke Chapter 2 with ease – Oh, how we wish we’d hidden more of God’s words in our hearts when we were younger and it was easier!) 

Of course Mark is courageous, he is a Marine, trained for battle.  As I watch him enduring this first attack, I see a real Marine - silent and strong, confident and capable.  But not capable from his own strength; it is much bigger than that.  It’s amazing how God has so skillfully knitted together Mark’s battle armor customized just for him.  The military endurance training is evident, but that is really a small part of it.  I see the armor strengthened by Mark’s faithfulness to PROACTIVELY seek God regularly through Bible reading and prayer, sharing his faith and building relationships.  He is memorizing scripture, consulting nurses and doctors, staying on top of all his medications, anticipating his physical needs. He is managing this so well.  He has been trained and prepared by the Almighty! 

Just weeks before this battle began, our pastor walked us through God’s words in Ephesians 6:10-20 – The Armor of God.  Wow, God told us what the armor should look like just before we knew we were entering this battle.  One thing that rang clear to me in those messages was that we are to “stand firm.”  While we are also to “do everthing,” the real emphasis is in STANDING and STANDING FIRM -- not continuing to attack but allowing God’s armor to protect us and letting God work!

I’m the researcher, analyst and planner in the family.  I find myself wanting to do more to plan , to analyze blood test, and seek more complimentary treatments.  Should we be pursuing alternative treatments?    I want to hover and control.  Mark is standing firm – Thank you God, that my husband is the head of our family.  And thank you for his spiritual strength especially in this battle.